Topics · Nicosia
Delinquent behaviour in teenagers
When a teenager breaks rules or the law, parents often feel fear, anger and shame. Behind the behaviour, though, is a young person who needs help, and there are ways to give it.
What we mean by delinquency
By delinquency we mean behaviour by a child or teenager that seriously breaks rules or the law. Examples include stealing, vandalism, violent fights, regularly skipping school or running away from home.
The word is not a label for the young person. Most teenagers test some limits, and that is part of growing up. When the behaviour becomes frequent, serious or dangerous, though, it usually means something is hard for them. It might be peer pressure, problems at school, tension at home, low self-esteem, difficult experiences or substance use. Often it is several of these at once.
Signs you may notice
Some signs that are worth not ignoring:
- Frequent lies or secrecy about where they are and who they are with
- Items or money they cannot explain
- Regular absences or exclusions from school
- Aggression, fights or damage to other people's property
- A new group of friends that pulls them away from the family
- Contact with the police
What you can do as a parent
Stay close, even when you are angry. Young people listen more easily when they feel you are not rejecting them as a person. Set clear, calm limits, with consequences that are fair and consistent. Try to avoid shouting, humiliation and threats, which usually lead to more conflict.
Notice the positives, however small, and say them out loud. Keep in touch with the school. And look after yourself as well. Living with this kind of worry every day is exhausting.
How we can help
Guidance from bodies such as NICE puts a strong emphasis on working with the whole family, not just the young person. Psychological support can help a teenager understand what is pushing them towards these choices, manage anger and impulsive reactions and see other paths. It also helps parents rebuild communication with them.
At Safe Space Psychology Center in Latsia, we offer individual sessions for teenagers, family sessions and assessments, to see whether other difficulties are also involved. Where needed, we work with associates in psychiatry, occupational therapy, speech therapy and special education. Sessions take place in person or online, privately or through GeSY.
Your first session
Many teenagers arrive reluctantly, and that is understandable. In the first session we are not looking for someone to blame. We listen to everyone with respect and agree together where to start. What the young person shares stays confidential, unless there is a risk to them or to others.
When to get help straight away
If there is violence, a threat with a weapon, serious injury or immediate danger to your child or to others, call 112. If someone has been hurt or their health is at risk, go to the A&E department of your nearest hospital.
Frequently asked questions
My teenager refuses to come. What can I do?
You can start on your own as parents. Working with parents is often very useful in itself, and many teenagers decide to come along later.
Does this mean my child will become a criminal?
No. Many young people who go through a phase like this find their way, especially with support from their family and from professionals. Getting help early makes a difference.
Will you tell the police or the school what we say?
Sessions are confidential. Confidentiality has limits only when there is a serious risk to your child or to others, and we explain this clearly from the start.
Other topics we work with
Sources and further reading
- World Health Organization: Youth violence
- NICE: Antisocial behaviour and conduct disorders in children and young people (CG158)
- American Psychological Association: Juvenile justice
This page is for information only and does not replace an assessment by a psychologist or doctor.